Sat, 07 Oct 2000 22:00
Logan would have been four years old today. We celebrated his birthday at his gravesite. We miss him now just as much as ever.
So many of our friends have been so thoughtful to us as Logan's birthday approached. His Sunday School teachers put together a beautiful photo album, full of pictures we had never seen before. And we received many cards and flowers. Thank you, everyone! Your thoughtfulness means so much to us.
Logan's birthday celebration was very special and personal. Knocker's sister Carla and her husband Doug went with us to the cemetery at 4:30pm. We also had Daniel Bridges (one of Logan's buddies) with us. And of course Adam. We all sat in a circle around the grave and held hands and prayed.
Laura had picked out three very special books to read:
"Mommy, Please Don't Cry", by Linda DeYmaz. This was a gift from Scott and Debbie Rabon after Logan died. It is a beautiful book which talks all about heaven from Logan's perspective. When we read it, we hear Logan's voice reassuring us that he is safe and happy now with Jesus.
"The Sunflower Parable", by Liz Curtis Higgs. The main character in this book is a boy named Logan. He plants sunflowers and takes joy in watching them grow, but then is sad when the flowers start to fall, until he sees that new life comes from the seeds. Laura saw this book by chance a few months ago, and we are still amazed how it speaks directly to our situation.
"My Birthday, Jesus' Birthday", by Holly Davis. This is a great book which beautifully describes the similarities and differences between the birth of baby Jesus and the birth of Logan (or any other person).
Laura read, "Mommy, Please Don't Cry", Doug read, "The Sunflower Parable", and Carla read "My Birthday, Jesus' Birthday".
Knocker read Scripture from 2 Samuel 12:13-23, where David who has just lost his son says "I will go to him, but he will not return to me." He also read from "Death of a Little Child", by J. Vernon McGee:
"Jesus wants to enter into your sorrow and sympathize with you. When Jesus went to a funeral, these amazing words are recorded, 'Jesus wept' (John 11:35). Because He had our humanity and was touched with the feeling of our infirmity, when He went to the cemetery, He wept--in spite of the fact that He intended to restore life."
I had read the story of Lazarus many times before, but I am struck like never before to know that Jesus wept! Wouldn't we expect Jesus to waltz in and tell everybody, "Hey, don't worry about it, I'm going to resurrect him. It's OK! Why are you crying? Don't you believe that I am the Author of Life?"
But no. The Author of Life wept at the death of his precious friend. Amazing. What an awesome God!
For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are--yet was without sin (Hebrews 4:15).
"There is a story of sweetness and beauty which enlightens the heart of every parent who has lost a child. It concerns a custom among the shepherd folk of the Alps. In the summertime when the grass in the lower valleys withers and dries up, the shepherds seek to lead their sheep up a winding, thorny, and stony pathway to the high grazing lands. The sheep, reluctant to take the difficult pathway infested with dangers and hardships, turn back and will not follow. Finally a shepherd reaches into the flock and takes a little lamb and places it under his arm, then reaches in again and takes another lamb, placing it under the other arm. Then he starts up the precipitous pathway. Soon the mother sheep start to follow and afterward the entire flock. At last they ascend the tortuous trail to green pastures.
"The Great Shepherd of the sheep, the Lord Jesus Christ, our Savior, has reached into the flock and He has picked up your lamb. He did not do it to rob you, but to lead you out and upward. He has richer and greener pastures for you, and He wants you to follow."
He makes me lie down in green pastures (Psalm 23:2).
After reading, we released 12 helium balloons (six of them said "Happy 4th Birthday" and the other six said "We Will Miss You"). First, we tied a laminated picture of Logan to a balloon, and Adam released it. Adam said, "Go get Logan, balloon!" Then Daniel let one go. Then we tied three balloons together to hold a laminated picture and poem with Bible verses on it. Knocker and Laura released it together. Then Carla, then Doug, then all of us had a remaining balloon, and we let them go at the same time (except Adam who got confused and let his go right away). What a beautiful celebration! And of course Laura took lots of pictures. We had a birthday party at home with pizza, cake, and ice cream (Lynn Bridges and her son Nathan joined us when she came to pick up Daniel).
God cried (John 11:35).